Reunification Day

Letter to an ex.

Dear G.

It was nice to talk again last week, after so long, but there's been a few things on my mind, and I thought I'd just write them down in a letter. You know how you and I are with mixed communication lines.

You said that you want to get back together again, that you want to - what did you call it? reunify? Weren't you always the romantic.

You know, we're not the same as we were back then,
So I don't know what that "re" is doing there.
Reunify.
As if we could rewind. Is that what you want?
Well I'm not a tape, and you can't turn back time.
If we're going to get together, there'll be no "re":
We'll have to redefine what the real situation is between yours and mine,
Cos I'm really not sure I can read your mind,
And I don't want to repeat the same mistakes as last time.
We're going to have to get to know each other again,
Like right from the start.

You know, I've been getting by just fine on my own -
I've been going out again, been meeting my friends,
And they get me like I'm not sure you ever did,
After all that you said,
All those times we stood there, head to head,
Not knowing who was going to make the first move,
But sure as hell ready to fire back when push came to shove.
I was so surprised how we could get
So cut off from each other in so little time.
And I was never one to go breaking down walls
When they've been put there for a reason.

I've heard that you've been doing okay.
Sometimes I see you on the news,
And I wont say that sometimes I don't miss you,
But I don't know if I want all the drama again.
I don't know if we really want the same things
Out of life.
We spent so much time together,
But maybe now we've just grown apart,
And I don't know if you've really dealt with our past
In a way that I can admire.
If we're going to start over,
There's some old stuff we really need to talk through,
And to be honest, it's going to be a while
Til I can really trust you.

You say you want to reunify,
But I think I'd rather just date for a while.
And I don't know if I'll ever want to move in together again.
I think we just like to organise ourselves in different ways.
And they say love's all about compromise,
But I say this is your shit, and this is mine,
And you can deal with yours however you like,
But i'm not going to tidy up after you.
Really, i've got better things to do.
And if I catch you judging me for how I keep my things,
You can just pack your bags right up.

All this time we've been separate,
I've been using to find myself,
And all this talk about unification makes me nervous -
You might think it sounds silly, but I just don't want to lose myself.

Anyway, these are just some of my thoughts. I'd be willing to talk again if you want.

Yours, G.